I understand that I am always loved

Unconditionally

But sometimes I just want to be told by someone else. 

I want to be stripped naked

My soul bare

I want to be torn apart and have someone else put my pieces back together

Isn’t that why I’m here?
To be human?

To fuck and rage and fuck up and sleep around and be?

Can’t I have love from a man? Hell, from a woman?

Can’t I be touched and rubbed and muttered to?

Fuck, oh fuck why

Can’t I get out of my own way

Hot means nothing if all I have is my own hand. 

But him? Too old, too intimidating, too cute, too ugly, too nice, too mean

I’m scared.
Why the fuck do I need balls to have someone suck them.

Things should just come. 

Cum. 

COME!

Jesus.