it was not a good relationship. don’t forget that you have anxiety around it always, it wasn’t healthy. you deserve something better. you don’t want to marry him and he doesn’t feel like your person.
you would be going back because you hav been feeling shitty lately. that’s ok, its understandable, but its not a fair reason to go back. it’s not fair to him or you. and if you really loved him, you wouldn’t feel like you needed to use him to feel better. you would want to go back because of who he is.
this pain is temporary. you are going to get on medications, see a therapist, you are going to be ok. everything feels insurmountable right now, but focus on taking this a day at a time. tomorrow you are gong to a therapist. that is a step in the right decision. and i am proud of you for doing that.
you are an exaholic. that is ok. that is normal. its understandable. but you cannot drag another person along with you to feel better.
you needed to be medicated to be in that relationship.
what will speeches at my wedding be like if we do do this
i cannot wait to fall in love with another person again
when you were with him, it felt like being intimate with another human was a betrayal